gradient feelings

tonight i am tired. the week has already been long and i find that it is only monday. i have been working hard, preparing my presentation on van den berg's book "things: four metabletic reflections" --- the thing that has me tired most though is the thinking, thinking, thinking that this book has caused within my brain. i do not dare scare away such thought or push it from my brain. i had never heard of van den berg before. but now i find that anyone who is measuring/tracking/data-fying/recording things of this world needs to read this. to remember that everything is held within the perception of the individual. i am going to place my notes here...really just a quotation summary from the book. i've tried to make concise the 125 pages of reading down to a simple 4...this way it makes the task less daunting and perhaps more accessible for those who do not have time to search for and read.

on other notes also strangely connected to time and dimension, the days are strange here for me. some days pass quickly, others with a painful slowness. i do not mind my independence and am allowed to embrace it more here than many other places i have lived in the past. i enjoy the small fact that i can go here or there, to drink my coffee in a solitude that i find comforting...it is a wonderful feeling not to have the pressing need for company other than one's own.

lentilles, poivrons, celeri, huile de canola, persil frias, amandes, sel de mer, vinaigre de vin rouge, epices: a recipe for lentil salad

i miss my kindred spirits from time to time. it is nice to hear the comfort of their voices or to receive notes in the mail...so far to date---3 postcards, 1 package, and 1 card received. i do not know why these things seem to have more value over emails...i very well have said, so far to date---55 emails. the other day someone wrote me and told me that "real mail" was preferred, then proceeded to give me an email address by which i could write "real mail" to. since when did "real mail" become email? it is an interesting question and right now i do not have the energy to ponder upon it...but for future thought.

i need to write about thesis...i've finally secured my thoughts about what it should be and narrowed the issues i want to tackle. but until it is set forth in writing, i feel that this concreteness can pass away and be forgotten within moments. by next monday i hope to have done a few sketches and start my thesis blog.

i still haven't gotten a chance to watch all the charles and ray eames dvd's...i have another 2 dvd's that contain 1920's and 30's experimental films, many of which are by man ray and marcel duchamp...i really loved it, especially "l'etoile de mer" by man ray.

i'm officially a caffeine addict again. i didn't leave for coffee at all today, confined myself to the computer and my work for once imposing discipline. by 2pm my head was killing me, so i had to escape across the street and grab a giant coke...within minutes the headache was gone. this is bad. very, very bad.

one of the cats has fallen asleep on one corner of my bed. curled up tightly into a ball of fur. snuggled closely agains the pillow. how jealous i am...jealous of the sleep and the cuddling. i shall go now, with hopes that i can at least fulfill the sleep portion of that wishlist.