My surrogate brother called me today...once again with sadness in his heart. I wished so badly to be alongside of him sitting on a grassy hill, basking in the warm sun together. He told me of adventures in San Luis Obispo, and my heart dropped to remember the life I spent there, so many friends, so many laughs, so many memories. [sigh] And now I feel as though I have been dropped in some foreign land, where snow and coldness resides. What the crap am I doing here? I have to remind myself of the goals I have set for myself and yet I still wonder if being here is good for me. It's the seasonal adjustment sickness proabably talking through my fingers right now. Seasonal disorder or not, it doesn't change the fact that I long for my friends and the love that surrounds me when I am with them.